Old Dreams
by TestShip
Summary: Anna's first birthday after John is released from prison. A birthday fic for pussycatwithattitude.


**A birthday fic for my very dear friend pussycatwithattitude, I hope you have a wonderful day.**

**Thanks to theglamourfades for reading this through for me.**

**Disclaimer: Not mine, else we would have nothing but fluff.**

* * *

><p>She sat alone mending one of Lady Mary's dresses in the servants' hall, her usual demeanour much more downcast than on other days. Normally she would be sitting here with her husband, but unfortunately that wasn't the case. It was his first trip away with Lord Grantham since he was released from prison and even if she knew it was their job, it didn't make his absence any easier. He had offered to feign illness, since today was her birthday and he didn't want his wife to celebrate her first birthday in their cottage alone, but she had scolded him for his silly idea, telling him they would celebrate her birthday properly when he got back.<p>

But even if he wasn't here with her, the mere thought of him was enough to make her smile today. Ever since he was released from prison three months ago she had all the more reason to smile, the fact that they simply couldn't get enough of each other giving her many memories to smile about. Lord and Lady Grantham had been kind enough to grant them a few days off in the beginning, and they used their time to get reacquainted with each other, trying to make up for lost time. After those few days they only needed one look at each other to know what the other wanted, often resulting in John pulling her upstairs the moment they entered their cottage, both grateful for their own little heaven on earth.

They teased each other throughout work, trying to see who would break first and she knew she was a weak woman when it came to him, only needing one look from him to pull him outside in the courtyard, desperately wanting to feel his lips on hers again. It was moments like these that made her miss him even more. She missed seeing him walking through the corridors or running into him when she least expected it, she missed sitting next to him in the servants' hall, but most of all she missed coming down the stairs to see him waiting for her in the hall, ready to take her back to their cottage. And it was all the harder today, missing him on her birthday.

She was pulled out of her thoughts by Mrs Hughes entering the servants' hall, "Anna, Lady Mary asked me to give you the night off, since it's your birthday. I will dress her tonight."

Anna smiled sadly, "She doesn't have to, I've got no plans."

The housekeeper raised her eyebrows, "Anna, it's not every day that you get the night off. There are many here who would want to trade with you. You should take this opportunity with both hands."

She stood up from the table, not wanting to seem ungrateful towards her employer, "You're right, Mrs Hughes, I'm sorry. Thank you very much."

She walked passed Mrs Hughes, but stopped as she felt a hand on her arm. She turned back to see the older woman staring at her with a soft smile on her lips, "I know you miss Mr Bates and I'm sure he misses you just as much, but you'll see him again in two days."

She nodded, fighting her tears and forcing a smile, "I know, we're going to celebrate together when he's back."

"Hold on to that thought, he'll be back before you know it. Try to enjoy your night."

"Thank you, Mrs Hughes, I'll try."

After placing Lady Mary's dress back upstairs, she went back down, took her coat and made her way to the cottage. She couldn't seem to call it home when her husband wasn't there.

This wasn't how she had imagined her first birthday in the cottage, and the thought of spending her birthday all alone made tears well up in her eyes. She didn't understand why they gave her the night off, when they all knew Mr Bates wasn't here. She'd much rather spend her night working than sitting all alone in the cottage, wishing he was with her.

And all of a sudden a thought struck her.

Maybe he was home, maybe he had found a way to come back to her for her birthday and they had given her the night off, because they all knew. She started walking faster, hoping that she was right and that he was home, but as she neared the cottage she realised that she was just fooling herself. How could he be home when she knew Lord Grantham hadn't returned that day?

The cottage was dark when she entered, just the way she left it this morning and she let out a sigh, it had been idle hope. She placed her coat on the hook and took off her hat, wishing she would see his hat right next to hers.

She walked to the kitchen, thinking she might as well prepare something for herself, but just as she entered she felt two strong arms wrapping around her from behind, a squeal escaping her lips at this sudden intrusion. But then she heard it; his chuckle, vibrating through her as he pulled her closer to his front.

He placed a tender kiss on her neck, moving his lips to her ear, his voice a husky whisper, "Surprise."

She turned around quickly, not daring to believe that he was actually here.

Her eyes were wide as she drank him in, taking in the dishevelled state of his hair and the twinkle in his eyes. She felt his hands sliding to her waist and only then did she notice that he wasn't wearing his jacket, only his waistcoat, his shirtsleeves rolled up to his elbows, his tie discarded, with just the right amount of buttons opened up for her to see his chest hair peeking through. Her breath caught in her throat and she felt herself blush at the sight of him, dressed just the way he knew she liked.

He looked at her with pure adoration in his eyes, a smile on his lips, "Happy birthday, love."

She couldn't hold back the tears from streaming down her cheeks, and he tenderly cradled her face with both his hands, wiping away her tears as he brought her lips closer to his, "Don't cry, Anna, it's meant to be a good surprise."

She smiled, bringing her hands up to his cheeks, "It's a wonderful surprise. I just missed you so much."

He mirrored her smile, "I missed you too."

She wrapped her arms around his shoulders and closed the distance between their lips as one of his hands trailed back down to her hip, pulling her flush against him. A week of pent up emotion flowed through them and into their kiss, both overjoyed to be together once again.

They reluctantly pulled apart as the need for air arose, but he held her in his arms, his forehead resting on hers, smiles etched on both their lips.

"How did you manage this?"

"Apparently I had been downcast all week, until Lord Grantham couldn't take it any longer and finally asked what was bothering me. So, I told him it was your birthday today and he granted me the afternoon and night off."

"He really let you leave him?"

He nodded, "Told me he could dress himself for once, but to be honest I'm not so sure he can."

She giggled, lightly patting his chest, "You shouldn't say that."

He chuckled, "I don't care anyway. I'm home with you, in time for your birthday."

He was rewarded with another soft kiss, but she pulled back frowning, "You only have tonight?"

"Yes, why?"

"What about tomorrow? Do you have to go back to London?"

He shook his head, "He's coming back tomorrow. So I'm all yours." He leaned in again, not able to resist her lips as they curled up into another beautiful smile just for him.

He broke away smiling and took her hand in his, pulling her to the backdoor that led to their small garden, stopping just before she could see what he was doing, "Ready for your other surprise?"

"Another one?"

The twinkle in her eyes made his heart burst with love for her, "You know me, full of surprises."

She felt her heart skip a beat as he threw her a wink and she couldn't resist wrapping her arms around his middle, hugging him close as she smiled up at him, "Thank you."

He chuckled, "You don't even know what it is yet."

"But I know I'll love it."

He cupped her cheeks and pressed a tender kiss to her lips, before he turned and took her outside.

She gasped when she took in their garden, looking up at her husband who was smiling down at her, "Oh John, It's beautiful."

The little garden was illuminated by candles, creating an orange glow that mirrored the twinkle in her eyes as she took in the sight before her. In the middle of their garden lay a blanket with a picnic basket and some blankets by the side, probably put there for when she got cold.

The soft squeeze of her hand made her look back at her husband and she reached up to place a sweet kiss on his lips, "I love it, thank you."

"My pleasure."

He guided her to the blanket and they both sat down, John leaning back on his elbows as he watched Anna taking everything out of the basket, smiling at her enthusiasm.

"How did you do all this?"

"I have to admit, I asked Mrs Patmore for help, but only because I didn't have the time to do it myself."

She smiled and leaned towards him to kiss him again, not able to get enough of him, "It's perfect, John."

He pulled at her hand as she made to move away from him again, a mischievous smile on his lips, "Come here."

He crushed his lips against hers and pulled her down with him as he lay back down, turning them on their sides, facing each other as their lips remained locked together. She smiled against his lips, making him smile in return as he rolled them over so his body was covering hers, his lips trailing down her neck, the sound of her soft sighs spurring him on as he tried to move her dress to kiss more parts of her skin.

She tangled her hand in his hair, pulling him back up, "John, we can't. We're out in the open."

He leaned up on his elbows as he continued placing kisses all over her face, "But I missed you."

She pulled his lips back to hers, kissing him languidly as she let her hands drift over his body, promising him through her actions that she would welcome him home properly later.

His eyes were still closed as she broke their kiss, breathing heavily as she gently sucked his earlobe, "Later."

He groaned in frustration as she tried to sit back up and he reluctantly rolled away from her, lying on his back as she seductively looked at him over her shoulder, her hand moving teasingly up and down his thigh.

He closed his eyes again, trying hard to control his body, "Stop it, Anna."

She looked innocently down at him, her hand moving a little bit higher with every stroke, "What?"

"You know what." He caught her hand and narrowed his eyes at her, not falling for her innocent look for one second, "Minx."

She giggled, pulling away from him as she set about arranging them both a plate with the food Mrs Patmore had given them. She had to admit that it took every bit of self-control not to drag him upstairs right this second, but she enjoyed teasing him way too much.

He sat up as she handed him his plate, one hand going through his hair to put it back in place. A small giggle escaped her as she noticed his actions hadn't changed the state of his hair one bit, but she didn't mind. She loved it when he looked like this, knowing she was the one who could turn the stoic Mr Bates into a passionate lover.

She didn't realise she was staring at him, until she caught his gaze.

"Do I have something on my face?"

She shook her head, a blush creeping up her cheeks, "I was just enjoying the sight."

He chuckled, "Well, tell me if I'm in the way."

She reached for his hand, entwining their fingers, "You're my favourite part."

He placed a kiss on her knuckles, still not believing that she would choose him above all the others, but he knew better now than to question her.

"I have another gift for you."

"John, you really shouldn't have. My wish came true when I came home to find you."

"Remind me to thank Mrs Hughes later for letting you go." He leaned forward to brush his lips gently against hers, "Besides, you deserve more than one wish."

She shook her head, "Silly beggar."

He smiled as he reached inside his back pocket and handed her an envelope, "I hope you'll like it."

Opening the envelope she found two train tickets to Scarborough and a small card from a hotel.

"I arranged it all with Mrs Hughes and Mr Carson, we have two whole days together next month to do whatever we want, but to be honest I just wanted to take you away from here, just the two of us."

She looked up at him with tears in her eyes, "Oh John, this is too much."

He took both her hands in his, moving himself a bit closer to her, "It comes with a suggestion."

She frowned, "What do you mean?"

"I hate being apart from you and if there's one thing that prison taught me, it's that I never want to be separated from you again, not ever."

She let go of his hand to cup both his cheeks, "I don't ever want to be apart from you again, either."

His hands dropped to her elbows, pulling her closer to him, taking a deep breath as he remembered that one night in the servants' hall and the dream they shared, "Why don't we start looking for a small hotel?"

She remained silent a while and he looked down, not knowing that he had just made her the happiest woman in the world.

"We don't have to leave here immediately. I know Lady Mary still needs you, but maybe in the near future. Unless you don't want to leave here, we don't have to, whatever you want, Anna. I'm with you, every step of the way."

He looked back into her eyes, feeling the love radiating from her, a beaming smile on her lips as tears fell down her cheeks.

She pressed her lips to his, resting her forehead on his, her eyes still closed when she spoke, "Yes."

He couldn't believe his ears, "Yes? As in, yes we'll start looking for a hotel?"

She had to smile at his uncertainty, "Yes, John, let's start looking for a hotel."

"Oh, Anna." He wrapped his arms around her, pressing soft kisses to her temple, "I love you so much."

She tightened her grip around him, "I love you too."

They sealed their promise with a kiss, their smiles hard to drive away as they imagined what it would be like to work together side by side every day.

She looked at her husband with pure adoration, feeling her love for him grow with every second, "Thank you, John."

He gently squeezed her hand, a half-smile gracing his lips, "I don't know what I would have done without you, Anna."

She pressed her lips to his cheek, not wanting him to dwell on the past, "We're together now, John, that's all that matters."

"You're right." He squeezed her hand one last time, before he let go to hand her back her plate, "Now, tell me about your week. What did I miss?"

As they ate they caught up with all the news, Anna telling him about her week and all the latest gossip from the Abbey as John told her what he had been up to in London when he wasn't with his Lordship. He told her he had visited his mother's old house to ask the tenants if they would be interested in buying the house if it was up for sale. Anna gave him a sweet kiss when he said he hadn't done anything yet, saying he wanted her opinion first.

After finishing most of Mrs Patmore's food, John cleaned everything up, wanting Anna to relax, telling her she really shouldn't be doing any work at all on her birthday, especially not when he was around. He disappeared into the house and she just couldn't wipe the smile from her lips. If someone had told her this morning that her day would turn out like this, she would have never believed it.

She took a blanket and wrapped it around her shoulders, feeling a slight shiver going through her, before she lay herself down to look up at the stars, waiting for her husband to return.

"Is there room for one more?"

He looked down at her with a smile as she moved over and patted the place beside her, setting himself down before he laid back next to her. She immediately took his arm and wrapped it around her shoulder snuggling closer to him, her head resting on his chest as he placed a soft kiss on her crown.

"It's been a while since I last gazed up at the stars."

She hummed, "For me too, but I'm sure I've never had a more beautiful moment than this."

He softly squeezed her shoulder and pressed a tender kiss to her forehead, smiling at her words. The thought that he had made Anna so happy on her birthday filled him with joy and in that moment he vowed to himself that he would make every birthday more special than the last, if only to see her beautiful smile.

They remained silent a while, both contemplating their future as they thought about the hotel.

"Do you still want children?"

Her question surprised him a bit and when he didn't answer immediately she lifted herself up on her elbow, looking down at him, "When we talked about our little hotel the first time, you talked about our family. Do you still think about our hotel in that way, with our children running around?"

He took her hand that was resting on his chest and entwined their fingers, "I can't imagine anything better than starting a family with you, so yes. I still want children."

She pressed a kiss to his lips, "Good."

As she lay back down on his chest, he suddenly realised that maybe she was trying to tell him something, "Anna?"

"Yes?"

"Is that your way of telling me that you're pregnant?"

She giggled as she looked back up at him, "No, you silly." She stared in his eyes, trying to read his expression, "Relieved?"

"Yes and no." Her face fell a little, and he cupped her cheek tenderly, wanting to explain himself, "I look forward to the day when you tell me that you're expecting our child, but for now, I'm glad that it's just the two of us. If only for a little while longer."

She smiled, squeezing his hand softly, "Me too."

They shared a sweet kiss, before she lay back down beside him, gazing up at the stars.

After a long silence it was Anna again who spoke first.

"Mr Bates?"

He couldn't contain the smile forming on his lips, after all these years he was still in love with the way she said his name.

"Yes, Mrs Bates?"

She leaned up on her elbow, as he turned his head to look at her, "Since it's still my birthday, can I make another wish?"

He smiled, his hand settling on her hip as he mirrored her position and leaned up on his elbow, "Your wish is my command. What can I do for you?"

She looked away, biting her bottom lip, knowing what it did to him before she looked back in his eyes, seeing them darkening as he stared at her lips. She tangled her free hand in his hair and pulled him closer to her, her voice no more than a whisper as she kept her eyes focussed on his, "I just want you."

His eyes darkened instantly as he grinned at her, "I think that can be arranged."

He stood up and took her hands to pull her up, taking her by surprise as he picked her up in his arms and began carrying her across the lawn to their home, her giggles filling the air.

"John, you shouldn't do this. What about your knee?"

He gave her a sweet kiss, "I can bear anything for you, besides I never got to carry my bride over the threshold of our cottage."

She couldn't stop giggling as she looked at him, her hands wrapped around his neck, her heart bursting with love for this gorgeous man, "I love you, Mr Bates."

He smiled, his heart still beating out of control whenever she said those words. He put her down when they were inside and backed her up against the wall, one hand leaning against the wall as his other settled on her hip, his lips inching ever closer to hers, "I love you too, Mrs Bates. Every day a little more."

She smiled into his kiss, enjoying the ever present flutters in her stomach whenever he was close to her.

As she took his hands in hers to guide him to their bedroom she was certain that she'd never had a more perfect birthday in her life and with her husband by her side, she knew it would only get better.


End file.
